Good Moms Make Cookies

And keep their house clean.....

This is not a story of Blake's birth, nor is it a look at a picture perfect life.  It is me being honest about the first 4 months with Blake.  (This is also not one of those annoying rants moms post that make them look nuts)

Long before I had Blake, somewhere in my subconscious I believed once I got married and had a baby I would be happy.... so happy that I would never be sad, angry, lonely etc. ever again.  After all that's how our mom's were right?  I was fulfilling my duty as a good Mormon girl.  I had been groomed to be a good mom.  I had tended other children for 11 years.  I had been a teacher of the hardest age.... 13.  I was ready.  Nothing could go wrong.  I had it all under control.  I understood babies.  I assured my husband, "I've taken care of other people's babies for as long as I can remember... don't worry."

Backing up to pregnancy and birth.  Pregnancy is long.  At the end carrying a baby the size of a watermelon feels.....well..... "Heavy". (To quote a former student who once asked if I felt heavy...at the time I was 20 weeks....no I didn't feel heavy.  At 34+.... yep I felt heavy)

The day Blake was born I went on my usual morning walk.  I had been having stronger and stronger contractions for weeks.  Most the time I went on walks I would actually get contractions so strong I would have to stop, I often thought I would have him right there in the street. (silly me)  I went to Costco after my walk.  My contractions were getting stronger, but I was convinced I was fine.  I realized I was bleeding.  I called my Dr.  He told me to get some monitoring at the Hospital.  I drove myself there.  My husband was in school and I didn't want to worry him.

Well I was in Labor.  I was progressing.  The Dr. wanted to see how I'd respond to a little Pitocin.  I was ready.  By 3 am I was ready to have Blake.  He was in a weird position, so with my Epidural completely phased out I went to work.  Every time I pushed I felt better. After a little less than 3 hours (of pushing) Blake came!  I was so empowered!  I was definitely in need of some pain meds after that :)

Blake was Jaundice, so we had to supplement with formula.  After that he never wanted to nurse again.  I killed myself over that.  I was convinced I was an unfit mother.  I got over it.  Blake loved bottles.  I just had to find the right formula because he had a sensitive tummy.  Finally got him on Gerber Good Start Soothe.  

I had a wonderful husband, and cute baby.  I would never want for more!  Wrong.  Babies are the hardest thing you will ever do.  You look in the mirror and don't recognize yourself.  You don't get to do whatever you want.  You are tired, hormonal, fat....but you are supposed to smile, look perfect, keep your house clean, make all the meals, and don't forget.... make cookies.

I love making cookies.  I love skinny jeans.  I love going to the movies.  I love going on long runs.  I love being able to have my house organized.

Guess what....it's gone.  I have a perfect baby.... who had terrible colic.  I never got anything done.  Then after a long day I would look in the mirror and not recognize who I saw.

These are the facts.  Why cant we be more honest with each other?

I have never felt so whole and complete in my life.  My son has my nose and lips.  He smiles at me.  He talks to me.  He gets excited when I come in the room.  I am everything to him.  I love him and he loves me.

Sickness, sleep regression, continual gut and feeding issues.  I deal with them everyday.  I am a nut.  I don't recognize myself, but I am the new me.  I wanted this remember?  I would never go back.  Some days I have moments of weakness where I wish I could be back in my cute (small) teacher clothes teaching about the American Revolution.  I felt empowered.  I felt accomplished.  That was then.

I created a human.  I am learning to be a mom.  Once and a while I still make cookies.  I go on walks with my son.  My house never stays very clean.  I manage to make dinner most nights.  Movies...they don't happen.

My son is perfect.  I am not.  He is teaching me.  I need to listen.

I am whole.

(PS- Bless my husband.  Don't forget your husband. Take a look here)

I'll be sure to post Andrew's favorite cookies...

Birthdays, Cake, and Sunday Fun

On Sunday we celebrated my sister Christy's birthday.  We had a nice dinner at my cousin Sarah's house, and then enjoyed cake.  (Thanks Sarah!!!) Christy wanted a "fruity cake" over chocolate.  So I pulled out my new favorite cook book, "Miss Kay's Duck Commander Kitchen", and decided to try the banana cake.  It was amazing!  My brother got me the cookbook for Christmas, and the cake and cookie recipes I have tried have all been delicious.  Of course with any recipe I always have to put my own spin on it.  Mainly if its a cookie, cake, or frosting and it doesn't call for vanilla, I will always add it in.  My rule is to always make a recipe your own!

Blake had his 4 month doctor appointment 9 days after his 4 month birthday, yesterday.  He was so good.  Just smiling at everyone.  Of course then came the shots :/ but he handled those well too.  The poor boy has had an intestinal virus and had lost a little less than 2 lbs.  So my little baby with the chubby belly has lost some of that chub.  He came in at 14.8 lbs and almost 27 inches! Talk about long and lean!  Overall he has become such a happy baby, with a stubborn streak!  My mom told me early on, I had to decide if Blake was my boss or if I was Blake's.  Blake has figured out his mom is boss.  Now hopefully we can work on sleeping through the night again. Ever since his colds (3 of them) he has wanted a 4 am feeding.  Oh well, it's a process right!

Banana Cake with Caramel Icing

Cake:
2 1/2 c. flour or cake flour
1 2/3 c. sugar
1 1/4 t. baking powder
1 1/4 t. baking soda
1 t. salt
2/3 c. Crisco
1 t. vanilla
1/3 c. Buttermilk
2 mashed bananas
2 large eggs
2/3 c. pecans or walnuts  OPTIONAL

Frosting:
1 stick (1/2 c.) butter
1 c. brown sugar
1/3 c. milk
1 t. vanilla
3+ c. powdered sugar

Preheat oven to 350.  Grease your pans (I use Bakers Joy or Pam Baking with Flour spray.)  Use either 2 cake rounds or 9-13' pan.  Whisk the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt together.  Beat the Crisco and sugar.  Add eggs and vanilla.  Once fully mixed alternate adding buttermilk and flour mixture.  Starting and ending with flour.  Fold in bananas and nuts.  Bake for 10 mins on 350, then lower the temp to 325 and bake for 20-40 mins depending on your oven.

Pull the cake out and cool slightly. Poke some holes.  Melt butter in a saucepan on medium low heat.  Add the brown sugar and bring up the heat to medium.  stirring constantly bring up to a boil for 2 minutes.  Add milk and bring back up to a boil.  Bring off the burner and let cool slightly.  Stir in vanilla.  With an electric beater, add in the pwd sugar until it reaches desired consistency and sweetness.  Frost.  Enjoy with some ice cream or on its own!  We used Butter Pecan ice cream..... YUM!

Tortilla Soup and Rolling Over

Last night Blake rolled over for the first time since he was a newborn!  We had been working more on tummy time (I think most babies hate it at first) and he wasn't rolling!  It will be an even bigger milestone when he can go from back to belly and back again!  Then I will have to watch him like a hawk.  He is definitely on the stubborn side.  Most babies get offended when you suction their nose, but he holds a grudge.  I am not kidding. He will cry for 30+ minutes after until he finally takes a little cat nap.  It is funny to see his personality emerge.  He is growing up too fast!

Tortilla Soup

A lot of people have their own versions of this, most people dump everything from a can (yuck).  Well this recipe is loaded with veggies and has a lot of wiggle room.  It can be made in your crock pot, or on the stove top.  If you do make it in the crock pot, make sure to give yourself at least 4-5 hours for cooking. More if you are cooking it on low.  It serves 4 adults or a family of 5 (3 small children).  So adjust as you see fit.  I'll be giving instructions for the crock pot version.

Ingredients:
1-2 Chicken breasts (I put mine in the crock pot frozen)
1/2 jar La Victoria Salsa (or green salsa of your choice)
2-3 TBS Lime Juice (Or more :)
Cumin
Garlic Salt
1 bay leaf
1/2 Chopped onion (Freeze dried works fine!)
1 medium chopped zucchini
2-3 chopped carrots (Or about 10 baby carrots)
3 chopped stalks of celery
1 can of favorite beans (RINSED WELL)
1 can Rotel diced tomatoes
1 can Mexican stewed tomatoes blended smooth
3 cups Water divided
2 cups Chicken Broth (Made by bullion or purchased)

*OPTIONAL
Cilantro
Kale
Chopped sweet peppers
Drained and rinsed can of corn
Yellow Squash

Put your chicken breast, salsa, lime juice, Cumin, and garlic salt with 1 cup water in the crock pot on high for about 2 hours. Then come in and get all the yucky fat off the chicken with a spoon.  You may have to loose some of the yummy salsa, so you can add more back in if you would like.  Add in the bay leaf, the extra water and chicken broth, and the onion.  Also add in the tomatoes.  Let it go another 45 mins to an hour.  Pull the chicken out to cool a bit so you can shred it.  Chop up all your veggies.  Add back in chicken and veggies.  Add in the rinsed beans.  Let go another 2 hours on high, or 4 hours on low.  Check to make sure the carrots are soft.  Serve with any variety of cheese, avocado, or sour cream!  Enjoy!

"Eat, Pray, Love"

Although the order in my house should really be Love, Pray, and Eat.... I wanted a tagline.  Welcome to Andrew and Jenny Hebdon's family blog!  We will be posting crafts, recipes, and Blake...lots of Blake.  My attempt is to be honest about being a mom, and share some of my laughs and tears....and lets be honest...some days there are more tears than laughs.  Andrew and I just love our son Blake.  He is 4 months old now.  So come follow us on our adventures and we wonder through life.  Enjoy!